I'm sitting here in the basement of my wife's parents' house in the suburbs of Buffalo today, happy to report that this is the 2nd to last day we'll be here. It may sound wrong to say such a thing, but I'd like to first state my case as to why this week hasn't been something I'll take to my grave.
First, our sleeping arrangment is as follows: A futon, very narrow (twin sized), with thin padding. Barely enough room for both of us to sleep on. My back hurts right now.
They have 6 adult dogs and 8 puppies. Whenever the door opens or anybody makes an audible sound in the house, there is about 15 solid minutes of barking before they finally shut up. That is, of course, until the next time a sound is made. Then cue the dogs again.
The stepmother is a chain smoker and thus has made me smell like smoke too. But this isn't the worst part...my wife is giving her a ride to Walmart as we speak to pick up dog food for the 14 dogs.....and she advised me that she'd try to tell my stepmother not to smoke in our car, but sometimes she doesn't listen to her.
WTF?? Who here that doesn't allow smoking in their car would allow some fat, chain smoking toad like her stepmother to do it anyway?? For fuck's sake, it's our property and if we don't want somebody lighting up cheap cigarettes in it, my wife should be able to tell her that definitively. ARGH!
By the way, we're the guests here, and yet we end up paying for more of the money that goes towards making the dinners than anything.
So between the tiny futon, the 14 dogs, being taken advantage of to buy everything because we're "rich", and the smoking....I can say that crossing the TN state line again on Saturday will be an orgasmic experience.
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Oh wow! Doesn't sound like you're going to have a very Merry Christmas. Maybe you could ride with your wife to help her in telling the stepmother not to smoke in your car Ang that way it would get you out of the house for a while.
ReplyDeleteOHHHHHHHH my gosh!!!!!! I'm trying not to laugh, but I just can't imagine you in this situation!!! LOL.......Chain smokers ARE SO GROSS AND YOU SHOULD POST A SIGN IN YOUR CAR SAYING NO SMOKING!! She obviously has no manners whatsoever....
ReplyDeleteGet your ASS BACK TO TN............I know it's not paradise here but you may feel like it is for a while...You really do love your wife don't you? To put up with this crap I KNOW YOU DO!!
If it helps any......I have some in-laws that are similar....just don't have the smoking....they are drunk the whole holiday and fighting .....
HAPPY HOLIDAYS BABY <3 <3
Do you have to go there ever year???????God I hope not!!!!
O Hell nah!! Why the fuck are you guys made to buy ANYTHING?! You're the guests for Christ sakes!!! Can't say I blame you one bit for wanting to get out of there ASAP!! And I would'a made the "Toad" leave her cheap cigarettes at the house before she put ONE toe in my car!!
ReplyDeleteThat's awful. I developed asthma in college and it's always hell coming home because the place continuously smells like cigarette smoke, despite my parents "quitting" (you know, which they never do for more than an hour or two). I say tell her she can pay for a full service car wash including upholstery deep cleaning if she decides to smoke in your car.
ReplyDelete~Amanda P.
Sadly, I have to say that this is probably more like most people's holidays than not. After a ridiculous holiday last year, I am happy to say that we are staying home this year. So you opted not to stay in the camper, eh? I didn't think that was going to be a feasible option with the weather. And offering to pay for meals is a wonderful gesture and is so appreciated by hosts - being EXPECTED to shell out money by your hosts is completely annoying. These people sound just like my sister-in-law's mother and step-father...lucky you...
ReplyDeleteUgh, I'm so glad Thad and I are broke up for the family reasons. His family consists of big fat smoking hillbillies, too. And I'm not used to smelling cigarettes anymore, so the last few times I had to ride in the car with his mother I wanted to throw up all over her.
ReplyDeleteJust bring it up to her, your wife's mother. Say, "Not to be offensive, but we don't want smoking in our car." It may make your wife mad, but you've got to put your foot down.
I think I've explained the alienation of my holiday to you. As I was reading, it came across that both of you must not be used to it, so I have to assume that Heidi did not grow up there, as I would probably not go back if I did. But none the less, hope you guys have a great Christmas and try to make the best of it :)
ReplyDeleteAmber
So sorry to hear you're having a horrible time, but I do hope that somehow you and your wife end up having a Merry Christmas :) My family and I had a seafood boil and it was amazing! We had snow crab, king crab, blue crab, shrimp, crawfish, lobster, corn, sausage, and new potatoes, yummmm :)
ReplyDeleteOne time when I barely knew Donalds family he got in a big argument about religion (my in- laws are Christians and Mormans and we're basically Atheists) at Thanksgiving. It was awkward because even though I obviously support my husbands beliefs I wasn't going to sit there with him and argue with people that would still love no matter what, but would probably hate me with a passion if I chose to do so. So I ended up in my 8 year old sister in-laws bedroom playing barbies (which I never even liked as a child). My husband at one point got so angry he took off leaving me there. It was very awkward to say the least, but it was probably best that I kept my mouth shut. Everyone (even my husband)apologized later and I know it made my husband love me more for sticking through it all.
ReplyDeleteI know all about chain smoking hick relatives. Eww... luckily she is in Oklahoma with her mother and they can have fun reinforcing each other's delisions. She gave our son Coca Cola when hee was three months old, who does that especially with out consulting the parents? Well, my Christmas was fine. I particularly enjoyed the part that did not involve our extended families. I said was because we celebrated most of Christmas today.
ReplyDeleteJust be glad Chris, that Christmas only comes once a year... with rellies like these you're going to have to cultivate some very good friends near to your home!!
ReplyDeleteBe brave, get some good car freshener, some earplugs, and a blow-up camp bed in case you ever have to stay there again...
Merry Christmas to you & Heidi both, and to Tanner & the cats.
- Annie XXX
all i can say is, im glad my marriage is over. i never have to travel to a relatives house again, and my relatives live too faraway to bother.
ReplyDeletemy sympathies.. id be about ready to commit homicide by now.
Oh, wow. I'm pretty sure we would have left after a day or two. Our holidays have been busy but thankfully not too bad. We have the rest of tonight to do whatever we feel like doing. Tomorrow we're doing lunch with my sis & her man then game night with one of my cousins and his boyfriend plus my sister and her boyfriend. Sun we see the husband's brother & his girlfriend for the Steelers game. Then a couple days to chill before hitting the road to Canada again. Safe travels back.
ReplyDeleteMy bollix holiday is just ending now. Honestly...I don't know how you summon up the fortitude to travel and deal with all of that bollix for an already stressful season. I give you credit for that. But if it were me...I don't think I could be forced to go through it. Have a safe trip home!!!
ReplyDeleteMe go pass out now :-P~~~
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing ruder to me than when a smoker smokes in a place that doesn't belong to them (ie: your car or home). It's a smelly enough habit on their own, why drag your environement into it! Especially a car, that smell lingers forever...ugh.
ReplyDeleteWhat a disasterous week, I would be so miserable that I wouldn't care how many speeding tickets I got getting out of there! Have a safe trip back to TN!
Hopefully, you're back across state lines by the time you read my comment. I'm sorry, Chris, that just sounds awful! As big as I am on family, and as much of a diplomat as I try to be, I'm not sure even I could have put up with all of that. I would have said something, for sure, after a day or two.
ReplyDeleteMy holidays were wonderful, since you sort of asked in the email announcement, but I won't rub it in by elaborating.
I'm sorry you didn't have a more enjoyable holiday.
Oh Chris :) Im so sorry you had to go through that! I can imagine. I dont much care for dogs and I cant stand smoking... (ugh!) and yeah, i can imagine your back pain too! I dont allow smoking in my home or car, and so far no one has just did it anyway..... My christmas was as follows: Everyone cancelled. Its the first year in our new home, which is huge! and I wanted to do christmas... everyone said fine. My mom came. but there was suppose to be a storm,so everyone else bailed. I knew my step dad would he lives like hrs. away and if its bad weather he really cant make it. my husbands family ... :) they live about 1 hr. away. NOW Im NOT NOT NOT saying that they didnt want to come or that they purposely used the weather as a reason to come. But they didnt. and the storm never came until the next day. I was on face book, and posted "I feel stood up"... to which started world war three!!!! My husbands sister and Niece let me know that I was soooo wrong to post that and disgrace their family like that and I had better apologize and how they lost all their respect for me and they didnt want an excuse, just an apology... (I was saying I felt stood up, not that they STOOD me up) (sigh) so.... I finally went to bed christmas eve crying myself to sleep after mean texts from his sister and after being swore at my his 14 yr. old neice. I did apologize. said I was wrong to post it and it wasnt what I ment. and I was sorry to hurt anyone. then I deleted them all off my face book. im so tired of drama and being misunderstood and not even being able to say how I feel anymore!!! whatever! what country do we live in anyway.... well, its good to know where you stand w/ someone. Still havent heard an apology from them.....
ReplyDeleteI can very honestly say I've never had a Christmas that bad. But I have had someone smoke in my car before after specifically asking that they not. I'm not a yeller, so I just coolly informed the smoker that if I were ever kind enough to offer her the loan of my car again, she was NOT to smoke in it, because it was MY car. I don't know why smokers act like you can't smell that shit when they get out. It's a car--most of the time you're spending thirty minutes or less in it. Can't you smoke before you go, then drive, then smoke after you get there? Hell.
ReplyDeletethats.....family for ya
ReplyDeleterude inconsiderate fatass whitetrash sounding family
-dallas